Babysat
by idiotique
Summary: While her parents are out for the morning, Renesmee is stuck at home with Jacob and Rosalie to look after her - or will Renesmee need to look after them instead?


_A/N: I've been wanting to write this story for awhile now but laziness, procrastination and school prevented me from doing so._

_Enjoy!_

_--_

**Babysat**

I opened my eyes and smiled when the sun shone through my small window, greeting me by touching my face with its warm, inviting rays. Yawning, I sat up in my crib (I didn't know why Momma and Daddy insisted on me sleeping in this cage of a bed when they were fully aware that I had an abnormally high intellect for my age) and took a quick look around. My room was small, but I didn't mind it; it wasn't like I needed anything bigger - well actually, maybe my closet need a little refurbishing since Aunty Alice and Aunty Rose bought me new clothes literally almost every day.

"Awake already, Renesmee?" Momma had opened my door just a little bit to poke her head through. Her pewter eyes glittered in the morning sun and her soft brown hair hung gracefully like vines in a rainforest canopy; she was so pretty. I nodded and stood up with one hand on the bar of my crib and the other clasping my favourite toy: a cuddly, light brown bear given to me from my Uncle Emmett - for some reason, when he gave it to me Daddy and Uncle Jasper started laughing; I never saw what was so funny and it still puzzled me to this day.

Momma stepped towards my crib and held me under my arms, lifting me up and out of my prison-like bed. Her cold touch was soothing against my skin as she pressed me closer to her. I raised the hand that wasn't holding onto my bear and placed it lightly against Momma's neck; I wanted to show her what I dreamt about last night.

"Pretty," Momma murmured to me; I smiled at her approval, "you really like that meadow we went to last week didn't you?"

I smiled at the memory and nodded once; my bronze curls bounced in unison. I heard another set of approaching footsteps and I glanced over Momma's shoulder to see who our visitor was: Daddy was leaning against the doorframe, smiling serenely. I laughed, delighted to see him, and reached out to him with my free hand; Momma was laughing too.

"Hello love," Daddy crooned as Momma passed me over to him; he held me high above my head and I laughed some more, "did you sleep well?" He lowered me and held me close to his chest.

I lifted my hand onto his cheek and showed him what I showed Momma; his eyes closed as I sifted through my dream for him: sitting in the sunny meadow, our skin glistening like diamonds; Jacob prancing in the grass, barking heartily…

Daddy chuckled as he reopened his eyes and nuzzled his head against the side of my face; his hair tickled my cheek and I giggled. "We'll go again sometime soon, I promise." He said, his dark eyes twinkling. I nodded enthusiastically and wrapped my free arm around his neck as he led Momma and I out of our little house and into the big house on the other side of the river.

--

Inside, everybody piled into the family room to greet me: Grandpa and Grandma leaned in to give me their ritual good morning kisses; Aunty Rose smiled her usual breathtaking smile and pecked me on the cheek; Uncle Emmett laughed my favourite booming laugh and mussed my hair (for some reason Momma, Aunty Alice and Aunty Rose didn't like it whenever he did that; I didn't mind it at all); Aunty Alice bounded forward to kiss me too and whispered in my ear that she was going to take me on another shopping trip sometime soon (Momma began to protest like she always did but I gave her an exasperated look and she fell silent immediately - I _liked_ going shopping with Aunty Alice; she always picked the prettiest things for me to wear); Uncle Jasper gave me a small smile and tweaked my nose like he always did, and my face scrunched playfully like I always did.

I immediately noticed that there was someone missing and I shifted around in Daddy's arms to press my hand against his neck. I thought hard, squeezing my eyes shut: I wanted to get Jacob's picture just right so Daddy knew exactly who I was talking - er, thinking - about.

"He's on a quick morning run with Seth and Leah," Daddy told me through gritted teeth; I had no idea why he was acting so begrudgingly, "he'll be back soon...to deplete our food supply of course."

I laughed at the last part of Daddy's sentence; Jacob really did have a big appetite, but why was that so irritating? It wasn't like anybody else in the house ate human food anyway - I didn't count; I only ate it when I was forced to.

"Are you ready, then?" I heard Momma ask Daddy. I looked up at Daddy, confused; ready for _what? _Daddy held me out towards Rose and she wrapped her cold arms around me. I turned to face Momma and Daddy; were they going somewhere?

Their black eyes lingered on me and I put two and two together: they were going hunting. Daddy nodded, assessing my thoughts.

"Your mother and I will be gone for the morning so Rose will be here to watch you," He said in his most 'I'm-your-Daddy-so-you-have-to-listen-to-every-word-I-have-to-say' voice, "be good." He grinned at me, hinting that the last part was a joke...I think.

"What about everyone else?" I asked; I only spoke aloud this time because I was addressing the rest of my family.

"Your grandfather is going to be working all day," Daddy had begun explaining; I noticed that Grandpa had already left and I felt a little disappointed that he was gone, but I knew it was for the best. Grandpa was a superhero; he saved people's lives everyday so he was needed frequently. I was willing to give up a part of my time with him for that, "Your grandmother and Uncle Emmett are hunting with us; your Aunty Alice is going shopping - _again _- and she's forcing your poor Uncle Jasper to accompany her."

Aunty Alice was smiling exuberantly at me; her thin hands were wound tightly around one of Uncle Jasper's arms. Uncle Jasper grimaced and I sort of felt sorry for him - he was being held captive for the day, like me. I wanted to go out and do fun things too, like everyone else; I didn't want to be treated like a _baby._

I was sure Uncle Jasper felt my frustration because his grimace turned into an apologetic half-smile, and I knew Daddy was reading my thoughts because he approached me and kissed my forehead.

"Jacob will be coming soon and you won't be so bored," He promised in a low voice, though it was unnecessary because everybody here had ultra-sensitive hearing anyway. I felt Aunty Rose's arms tighten around me just by the slightest, "make sure they don't break anything."

I knew exactly what Daddy was referring to and I nodded dutifully. Above me, Aunty Rose heaved an angelic sigh and shook her head; her wavy blonde tresses brushed against my cheek.

Jacob and Aunty Rose were my most favourite people in the entire universe, apart from my parents and my other family members of course, but the only problem about them was that they _never_ got along. I didn't like how Jacob pulled all those corny blonde jokes on Aunty Rose, and I also didn't like how Aunty Rose kept calling Jacob _dog_ or _mutt _or any other canine-related term - and that _Fido_ bowl she made for him wasn't a very nice thing to do either.

And I didn't care how many times they've argued about it - _neither_ of them smelled foul, or wet, or sickly to me! Everyone smelled wonderful for Pete's sake.

"We have to go now," Momma leaned forward to plant a swift kiss on my forehead; afterwards Daddy gave me two kisses on my cheeks, "have fun with your Aunty Rose and Jacob; we'll try not to take too long." Momma flashed me a smile and quickly left the room without making a sound.

Uncle Emmett poked my teddy bear's nose with his index finger before following Daddy out of the room; Grandma smoothed my hair and flashed a smile and left too. Aunty Alice moved forward to kiss me again.

"I don't care what your mom thinks, we're going shopping this week - just the two of us." She grinned, and I nodded excitedly; I was looking forward to that. She straightened up to dance off somewhere else; Uncle Jasper gave me one of his secret winks that always made me giggle and moved away to follow her.

I looked up at Aunty Rose patiently; she was already peering down at me with kind, honey-gold eyes.

"That leaves just you and me, Nessie." She smiled, and bounced me animatedly in her arms. I laughed as she swirled around in a full circle, my bronze ringlets swinging with her golden waves. I was still laughing when she stood stock still after one turnaround; she nodded towards the spiral staircase.

"Let's get that comb for you, shall we?" She suggested, and I smiled at her; my mornings were never complete without having Aunty Rose to comb my hair.

--

She still managed to ascend the steps with a soundless grace even with a half-vampire toddler in her arms; someday I wished to be as pretty as her. She nudged the door to her and Uncle Emmett's room open and I was overwhelmed by the strong scent of expensive floral perfumes and exotic silks. She set me down on the edge of the large bed - I didn't know why they needed it, but when I asked her about it once Uncle Emmett laughed and Aunty Rose looked slightly embarrassed for some reason - and drifted over to the vanity table to grab the brush she always used on me.

She moved - so graceful and quiet as always - to sit behind me, and I sighed in comfort as I felt the soft bristles of the comb skim through my bronze curls. Aunty Rose was the only one who knew how to comb my hair properly - not even Momma did it as fluid and smooth as Aunty Rose did. She continued brushing my hair for a few more minutes when the loud, sharp sound of bracken cracking shot through the air. A warm bubble of excitement inflated inside of me - that was definitely Jacob.

"Stupid mutt," I heard Aunty Rose mutter under her breath, and I turned to glare at her. That wasn't nice.

"Sorry Nessie, but I honestly can't picture myself forming a friendship with him," She scooped me up in her arms and hurried out of her room, probably because she was afraid Jacob's scent would 'stink' up her only refuge from him, "hopefully you'll understand when you're older."

I heard the front door open and Jacob's husky, throaty voice reverberated throughout the halls of the house. "Nessie! Where's Blondie keeping you this time?"

"She's right here, Lassie." Aunty Rose retorted as she finished descending the stairs, nodding down at me. Once Jacob caught sight of me his expression brightened; I laughed and held my free arm out to him - my other arm was still wrapped around my teddy bear. Aunty Rose brought her arms forward, careful to keep her face as far away from Jacob from possible, and Jacob took me into his arms; his touch was nearly as warm as mine. He tugged at the ears of my teddy bear, his nose wrinkled in disgust.

"Ugh - you reek, Nessie." He said teasingly; I rolled my eyes at him. Aunty Rose's foot was tapping in rhythm against the hardwood floor; Jacob and I turned to look at her.

"Haven't you realized what time it is?" Her eyes were narrow and scathing. Jacob squeezed his eyebrows together for a split second - when he remembered what time it was his face relaxed and his mouth popped open in a perfect 'o'. I was frowning and shaking my head.

"Time to feed Renesmee!" Jacob exclaimed, and he held me out in front of him at arms' length. I stared back defiantly - I didn't _want _to drink the disgusting baby formula, no matter how healthy it was supposed to be for me.

Aunty Rose brushed her hair behind her shoulder and spun around, gliding into the kitchen. I raised my hand to Jacob's neck - I forced myself to remember how the formula tasted like sour dirt and how it smelled like rancid meat. Jacob frowned and shook his head, much to my disappointment.

"Sorry kid-" He began walking quickly towards the kitchen because Aunty Rose hissed when she noticed he wasn't following her, "-your grandfather said so, and he's the doctor around here - he knows best."

I growled in vexation as Jacob crammed me into my high chair; Aunty Rose was already stirring the disgusting formula in the usual metal cup - its nauseating aroma wafted into my nose and I shrunk behind my bear; like Uncle Emmett, my teddy shielded me from things that I wasn't fond of.

"That's not how you do it-" I heard Jacob demur; there was a metallic clanging sound of a spoon hitting the inside of the metal cup, "-you're not putting enough of it in-"

"I know what I'm doing, _dog - _give that back!" I pulled my bear out of my line of sight and raised a questionable eyebrow; Aunty Rose and Jacob were holding onto the same cup, pulling it in different directions. I sighed and held the bridge of my nose with my index finger and thumb; Daddy did this whenever Aunty Alice bothered him - maybe if I did this too they would stop fighting.

"Hey," Jacob grunted though gritted teeth, "why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?" When Aunty Rose didn't answer - I could tell from the look on her face that she already knew the punch line - Jacob grated onward, "so she wouldn't wake the sleeping pills!"

Okay, I found that a _little_ funny in its own idiotic way. Aunty Rose growled and pulled the cup towards her with a little _too_ much force - her inhuman strength crushed not only the cup and the spoon inside it - but also the bones in Jacob's fingers.

"OW! JEEZ!" Jacob leapt out of the way, immediately relinquishing his hold on the cup. Startled by Jacob's scream Aunty Rose also let go of the cup, which now actually looked like a lumpy silver peanut thanks to her, and it clattered onto the floor. The icky formula sloshed out of the mutated cup, forming a white pool in between them. Jacob was swearing loudly like Grandpa Swan did whenever he watched a sports game on television. Aunty Rose had her back pressed against the edge of the counter, her bright eyes wide with...fear?

"Dumb blonde, you broke my fricking hand!" Jacob snarled, and for the first time ever I caught a glimpse of the wolf upon his human features. He squeezed his hand tightly, making sure the bones were in the correct positions as they healed. Aunty Rose dashed over to my high chair and plucked me out; I kept my eyes locked on my Jacob the entire time she took me to the family room.

I shifted in my aunt's arms to place a hand on her neck - shouldn't we help Jacob?

"He's a mutt," She grumbled, and my eyes narrowed at the derogatory term for him, "he heals abnormally fast." She gently placed me down on the couch in front of the television and sped back towards the kitchen, probably to clean up the mess she and Jacob made.

"You are _such_ an idiot," I heard her hiss; someone turned the tap on for a brief second. Then there was a damp splotchy noise as Aunty Rose dabbed at the tile floor with a wet rag.

"How am _I _the idiot? You were the one that broke my hand, She-Hulk!" I winced at Jacob's retaliation - he knew better than to call my Aunty Rose names.

_Splat. _Aunty Rose had dropped the wet rag. I scrambled off the couch, not forgetting to grab my bear, and raced towards the doorway to the kitchen; I promised Daddy they wouldn't break anything!

"What. Did. You. Just. Call. _Me?"_ Aunty Rose was so angry she didn't even notice me standing in plain view by the entrance; she was still squatting over the baby formula spill on the floor, but her head was angled towards Jacob, who looked even taller due to her lower position. Her eyes were burning with anger; Jacob was smirking smugly down at her with his completely healed fingers running through his short black hair.

"Grr," Jacob balled his large hands into fists and stomped his feet childishly; his face was contorted in mock rage and it was obvious that he was fighting back his own laughter, "Rosalie _mad _because Jacob smarter than her! Jacob no blonde; Jacob know more than Rosalie! Rosalie _smash!" _He deliberately made his voice higher pitched and raspier at a very poor attempt at imitating Aunty Rose's beautiful musical voice. He bent down to pick up the disfigured cup on the floor and growled at it before bursting into a peal of throaty laughter.

Jacob was _so_ immature sometimes - I wasn't even a year old yet and I found his behaviour inappropriate.

"That's it, Snoopy-"

"What's a blonde doing when you see her holding her hands over her ears?" Jacob's voice was not at all provoking but Aunty Rose's expression didn't change one bit.

"I've heard this-"

"She's trying to hold onto a thought." Jacob grinned. Aunty Rose's hands flexed into rigid claws and I knew what she was planning to do then; I stepped forward with my hands flailing; my bear was swinging wildly in the air.

"Stop it!" I trilled; at an instant Aunty Rose's hands relaxed by her sides and turned to gawk at me. Jacob took a step back from Aunty Rose, his nose crinkled in distaste - they had been so immersed in their annoyance for each other that they didn't even notice their close proximity. He gently placed the dented cup on the granite counter and beamed sheepishly at me. I crossed my arms, not willing to give in.

"Nessie," Aunty Rose held her arms out to me, but I shook my head. Jacob snickered and I fixed my glare on him; he held his hands up in defeat and hung his head in shame.

"I promised Daddy that I was going to make sure the both of you behave," I said, trying to sound as stern as I possibly could, "Grandma wouldn't like it if she came home to find her things broken!"

Now both Aunty Rose and Jacob's heads were hanging in shame; I felt a little proud of myself, knowing that they were the ones who needed more babysitting than I did. Daddy would've been laughing if he saw this.

"We're sorry, right Rosalie?" Jacob's voice was remorseful but his eyes were on my face and not Aunty Rose's. I exhaled in aggravation; did I have to do everything myself?

"I want you both to apologize to each other," I instructed; both Aunty Rose and Jacob's eyes were wide with shock and I suppressed a grin, "and I want you both to promise me you're not going to fight - at least for the remainder of the day."

Jacob groaned and Aunty Rose looked a little unsure, but they turned towards each other with forced smiles on their faces.

"'M sorry." Jacob muttered grudgingly. Aunty Rose crossed her arms and rolled her eyes.

"I as well." She grumbled resentfully. I huffed impatiently.

"With feeling, please." I prompted; Aunty Rose and Jacob sighed in defeat and faced each other again, their forced expressions even faker than they were before.

"I'm _really_ sorry for calling you She-Hulk, Rosalie," Jacob's voice was so sweet it even repulsed me, "and Blondie...and a dumb blonde. That was below the belt."

"And I apologize for calling you Lassie, a dog, a mutt, and Snoopy." Aunty Rose's perfect face seemed to be glowing, but I knew it was all just for show. In an instant they swiveled around to face me, and I nodded approvingly.

"Good," I smiled, and Aunty Rose and Jacob's false content expressions quickly transformed into looks of defeat. My smile widened automatically; Daddy would've been so proud of me.

--

It was just past noon now; Momma, Daddy, Grandma and Emmett should be coming back soon. I was sitting in the family room, safely wedged in between Aunty Rose and Jacob (they both decided to _pretend _that I drank my cup of formula today, much to my delight). Jacob was flipping through the channels at a blinding speed - luckily for me my vampire reflexes were swift enough to catch the shows he skimmed though. He stopped for a few seconds on the Food Network (a man with a large grill was barbecuing steak; I heard Aunty Rose scoff beside me) before continuing his channel surfing.

"Are you bored, Nessie?" Aunty Rose asked; her cold arm was around my small shoulders and her long fingers were playing with my hair, "Would you like me to read to you for a little while?"

I nodded vigorously; I liked it when Aunty Rose read to me. She excused herself for a minute to fetch a book; I played with my bear while I waited for her.

"Does he have a name?" Jacob had shifted in his seat to face me and my stuffed friend. My brow creased - I had never really put much thought into naming my bear. Jacob must've understood my expression because he was chuckling now; he reached forward to brush his fingers against the bear's round ears.

"Back," Aunty Rose returned to her seat by my left side with an old leather-bound book in her ashen hands; I immediately recognized the title: Momma's favourite story, _Wuthering Heights. _I smiled and clapped my hands together gleefully, excited to hear the story. Surprisingly enough Momma had never read it to me yet and I was anxious to read it myself. Aunty Rose smiled as she cracked the book's spine, flipping to the first page with a quick flick of her finger. Jacob rolled his eyes and turned back towards the television.

"Bo-ring." He enunciated the first syllable to emphasize his feelings; it was my turn to roll my eyes.

"Just because you can't see the importance of classic literature doesn't mean you have to shun it, do-_Jacob." _Aunty Rose snapped.

"I can shun whatever I want to, _Rosalie."_ I furiously shoved my hands to their necks, reminding them of their little incident earlier; they shuddered at the memory.

"Sorry, sorry," Aunty Rose threw her arm around my shoulders again and I snuggled closer against her side, sighing when I felt her cool skin against me. I still felt Jacob's fingers fumbling with my teddy bear's ears.

Aunty Rose finally began to read _Wuthering Heights_ and Jacob switched to a soccer match that he found mildly interesting; the both of them acted as if the other didn't exist.

Aunty Rose's ringing soprano voice was lulling me to sleep; I felt my eyelids drooping. Beside me, Jacob snorted.

"Look - she's so bored with you, she's falling asleep."

"Actually her afternoon nap is coming up, so naturally she should be feeling a little tired by now," Aunty Rose replied haughtily. I forced my eyes open and stared up at the both of them; they were both glowering at each other over my head. I grumbled in frustration - it was like they chose to fought at every given opportunity…

I reached up to press my hands against their necks again and they both jumped, startled - again they were too angry with each other to notice anything else. Once I had finished reminding them for the second time they stared down at me apologetically. I couldn't do much else but cross my arms and roll my eyes; I had been rolling my eyes a lot today, I noticed.

I felt a great invisible weight magically vanish from my shoulders when I heard the front door swing open; somebody was home to relieve me of all of this madness!

"Wow," Momma said from the doorway. I stood up on the couch to smile at her; her eyes were a gleaming gold, "they're actually sitting on the same couch."

"And they're not at each other's necks." Daddy filed in right after Momma, his eyes the same shade as hers, "Impressive." He shot me a furtive look and I beamed back; he knew I kept my promise.

"The house looks intact." Grandma sighed with a relief.

"Do I smell baby formula?" Uncle Emmett wrinkled his nose repugnantly. I hopped off the couch and swerved around it to leap into Momma's waiting arms.

"How did you-" But it was too late - Aunty Rose had sprung from her seat on the couch and walked briskly past Grandma; her heels clicked rhythmically as she made her way up the stairs. Uncle Emmett scratched his head, confused, and lumbered after her. Jacob muttered something about going out for some fresh air and stormed out the front door, but not without stopping to pinch my cheek affectionately first; I heard Daddy grinding his teeth for some reason.

"What happened?" Momma lifted me up to look at me properly. I peered at Daddy over Momma's shoulder first; he grinned toothily. Grandma stood silently behind him, shaking her head amusedly.

"I kept Daddy's promise." I answered simply.


End file.
